abrightboy | Voicemail (IC Contact Post) OLD

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I’ve been used. I was willing to live with it, but she got what she wanted and left.

I'm sorry. [Both that he was used and abandoned, and that he was willing to just live with it.]

What was it that made it worth living with?

…She was a good person and I’m not someone that… I have problems that put people off.

Everyone does, though, don't they? What's different about you?

I'm worse.

Worse how? I doubt you're worse than I am. Or some of our inmates

Edited 2022-10-24 20:29 (UTC)

Well. Not 'worse' as in 'more evil' so much as 'worse' as in 'more annoying to live with'.

[He grins] I ate my husband's favorite pair of boots when he wouldn't weed the garden. You can't be worse than that.

Maybe the problem was her.

I have to sleep in restraints and I wake up screaming almost every night. One time, I fell asleep without restraints and almost stabbed her. She stopped taking my calls for, like, three months.

Maybe you are worse than me. [He's teasing.

The smile drops away though.]

What causes you to stab people?

Night terrors. I didn’t know it was her; I thought I was fighting for my life. But I know better than to fall asleep unrestrained. I shouldn’t have been able to reach a knife to start with; I should have been strapped to my bed.

How long have you had these night terrors this bad?

Twenty years.

That's a long time to suffer.

What happened?

My father killed people. A lot of people. When I was ten years old, I found a woman in a travel trunk in our basement. He started drugging me with chloroform so I'd forget. I still only have fragments of memories from that time, but that's when the night terrors started.

I'm sorry.

When was he caught? Or was he?

Around then. I called the police as soon as I... came out of the stupor.

I don't know if I would have. Obviously my father never killed anyone, but I think I would have been too afraid to turn him in if he had.

I thought I was saving her. I thought it was the same day, but it was… at least a week later. Maybe more. She was gone. But I thought I was saving her.

By turning him in, you saved other women. I know that's not the same--but it brought closure to the families, too.

That’s what the policeman said. The one that came.

Is that why you decided to make a career out of working with criminals?

Yeah! Part of the reason, anyway. That policeman is the head of Major Crimes now. I was working for him as a special consultant before I came here. He’s the most upstanding man I’ve ever met.