"I want to catch whoever hurt Ellen," he murmurs. Neal pokes at the food on his plate, trying to summon up the desire to eat it. "Whoever. Killed her. I want to catch who did it, and I want them to pay."

That's absolutely true.

But.

"I don't know if I want him helping. I don't know if I want it to be done so he'll leave, or if I'm afraid he will. I don't... know what I want from him."