Malcolm nods, his eyes large and trusting, but also… longing.

“I want… I want to just…. be part of it. I guess… I mean everyone makes it look so natural that I thought when I changed, it would be part of my nature.” He puts a hand on Will’s chest. Lets himself just feel Will’s heartbeat for a moment. “When I was thinking it over… Neal and Raylan suggested that maybe I wanted it for the wrong reasons. After the moose, Lark disappeared, and I thought… what if he made a mistake? What if they were right and I made a mistake? But then you were going to turn and…. it was exciting. Going down a new path with you that isn’t yours or mine. But I wanted to do it. I wanted to. And I wanted to say something even up to the moment it happened, but I didn’t want to ruin your day by being selfish because I knew how much it meant to you, but all of it… it won’t go away.” He looks up from his hand to Will’s face. “How do I let the reins loose?” he asks earnestly. “How do I… let something happen? I want to feel something… that isn’t this. I’m always a square peg in a round hole and I want to feel something else.”