Malcolm is shaking his head before Will even finishes the question, his hands grasping at the front of Will’s shirt.
“No, no, no,” he protests once it’s out. “No. I wanted to do this with you. I just… I thought we would have to wait. Until I’d be allowed to change someone. And it didn’t occur to me that it would happen and it wouldn’t be me. And then suddenly it was happening, like, now and I wasn’t doing it and it was a lot. And I didn’t want to ruin it. And I thought I’d get over it, and I don’t know why I thought that; I never get over anything,” he admits, looking down at Will’s chest again. He fidgets with a button there. “And I still wish I did it, but I don’t wish you didn’t go through with it yet. I wanted it for you. I knew… I knew it would be easier for you. Sweeney told me to ask you about dog behaviour before I even did it. Everyone knew, if they thought about it.”
no subject
“No, no, no,” he protests once it’s out. “No. I wanted to do this with you. I just… I thought we would have to wait. Until I’d be allowed to change someone. And it didn’t occur to me that it would happen and it wouldn’t be me. And then suddenly it was happening, like, now and I wasn’t doing it and it was a lot. And I didn’t want to ruin it. And I thought I’d get over it, and I don’t know why I thought that; I never get over anything,” he admits, looking down at Will’s chest again. He fidgets with a button there. “And I still wish I did it, but I don’t wish you didn’t go through with it yet. I wanted it for you. I knew… I knew it would be easier for you. Sweeney told me to ask you about dog behaviour before I even did it. Everyone knew, if they thought about it.”