abrightboy | Voicemail (IC Contact Post) NEW

"You're changing the subject. I had no problem with how you handled it, Malcolm; remember? And I've never said people are one thing." He's risked his life trying to prove that people contain multitudes. "It's insulting that you're trying to paint me this way just to avoid talking about how you're spinning things to make sure you're somehow the victim."

“I’m not a victim. I asked you a question before you made your insinuations about how I view Will. You didn’t answer, so I asked again. You didn’t answer, so I answered it for you and drew my own conclusions. You had your chance. Now. As for Will. Do I think he lost control? Absolutely. He had an outsized fear response based on how Avalon harmed him before. Is that right? No. Is it understandable? Yes. Should he face more consequences than the provocateur that previously tortured him and promised, this time, to sink a blade in his back? No. Should his Warden be working on other methods for coping with a situation like that? Yes, but she knows that. Does that clarify matters?” Malcolm asks.

"This? This is why I'm not doing therapy with you, Malcolm. You need help. More than I do. I really hope you take it."

“…You’re not doing therapy with me anymore?” First he’s heard of it, though he shouldn’t be surprised. This guy has gotten on the Shaw koolaid since their early conversations. “Okay, I guess. Your call. But what exactly did I say that indicates I need help more than you do? I gave you a very reasonable analysis just now. So… what gave off the crazy vibes?”

"I don't want a therapist who makes assumptions about me when I'm trying to stay on topic. I don't want a therapist who puts words in my mouth or who assumes I see the world in black and white terms. I don't want a therapist who resists taking any accountability for his own part in arguments. You're just not the right fit for me, Malcolm. No one here is right now."

“We’re not doing therapy right now. This would be a whole different conversation if we were,” Malcolm points out. “And you haven’t answered my question. Again. Is that just… something you don’t do? Answer people’s questions so they can understand your shades of grey? They have to just trust they exist without knowing what they are? I’m not allowed to understand how you draw conclusions about me? What is it?”

"I'm not going to trust someone who assumes the worst about me, Malcolm."

"I didn't do that. I asked you questions and you assumed I assumed that. But, like I said, your call. Let's go back to the other thing. What exactly did I say that made you think I need more help than you do?" Malcolm asks.

"You literally said you assigned ulterior motives to me. I didn't imagine that, did I?"

Edited 2023-10-29 18:15 (UTC)

"I did say that. About our previous conversation. I also said that I put them on hold in light of you coming here. And even then, I only brought it up because I was making a distinction between subtext and ulterior motives. Right? That's what I told you about it."

"So you only admitted to me you were assuming wrong, dark motives about me because you were being pedantic, and that's supposed to make me feel better...? Malcolm, I think you're a good person. But I think your fears and your anxieties and your experiences lead you to assume the worst about people--about me, in particular, because I had the gall to be concerned about your ethics and your interactions with another warden. And I can't trust you with myself because of that."

"You still haven't answered my question," Malcolm points out.

He shakes his head. "Which question?"

"What did I say today that made you think I need more help than you do?" Malcolm repeats.

"Your terror of being the bad guy. Of letting someone you love be the bad guy. Your fear of losing people."

"Those are the most normal things about me," Malcolm tells him.

"Well, they make us incompatible as therapist and patient." So maybe reexamine the extent to which they run your life, bro.

“Or they could be things you can use more of. We could both possess traits that would benefit the other. Maybe the problem is that you say you need help, but you don’t actually want it. You don’t want to change your coping mechanisms of pretending your emotions don’t affect your reason at all - something you have in common with Shaw - and meddling without invitation to do so, so you can feel good about offering your largesse in solving other people’s problems to avoid examining your own.” He holds up a finger. “Before you take offence to all that, just… consider it. Give it a thinking over. We did good work together before… all this blew up. So. One more food for thought for old times’ sake. Cool?”

"And who do you do your therapy through, Malcolm?"

“Are you looking for a recommendation?” he asks with a friendly smile.

"Something like that," he says, his own expression polite but guarded in a way it never is.

“I talk to Kiryu. I talk to Francis, who used to work in this office. I talk to Raylan and Norton and Neal. I talk to Will. Is this now the guest list I can expect to hear is on the phone tree for my next meltdown?” But it’s rhetorical. He leans forward. “Can I ask you one more thing?”

"No, I think I'm done with your passive aggression," he says, standing, stretching. "Thanks, though."

“Why do you think Will wasn’t in control when he killed Avalon?” Malcolm asks anyway.

"He told me he wasn't, Malcolm." So maybe Will's lied to one of them. He is manipulative.

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abrightboy - 2023-10-29 21:13 (UTC) - Expand

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