abrightboy | Voicemail (IC Contact Post) NEW

I thought this wasn’t about sex or violence. I’m going to tell Eiffel the truth.

Of course I lay eggs! Demons lay eggs.

Whatever. Just give the brat his palisman if you wish us to be friendly.

Oh, really?

Yes, really.

[Blitzø is going to wait a very reasonable 15 minutes before messaging again.]

Did he answer yet?!

You’ll be the first to know when he does.

See, this is precisely why I feel we should just ask you. It takes far too long to go through multiple wardens for permission!

In which case the correct procedure was to ask Warden Eiffel directly.

You just insist on being as helpless as possible!

[bratty sibling energy go]

All right, that’s enough. You know the rules here. Are you suggesting I don’t go to bat for you?

No.

Do you want other Wardens going behind my back to decide things for and about you?

They already do.

Oh? Tell me more.

Oh please, if Kiki was in custodial and not turning up, are you saying that she'd be spared the dipshit in charge's stupid stink curse until they talked it out with you? You're honestly telling me there's never been an instant of a warden deciding to do something like that without going through you first? I call bullshit.

Everyone got a heads up in advance about that. And I spoke to Kikimora about changing departments because I knew she loved animals and would probably prefer working with them. And she said she would but the kennels were fully staffed. And I got her in.

Next Warden that allegedly went behind my back, please?

Satan's ass you're an insufferable prick. No wonder you're a warden, can't handle the idea that you're not always right all the time, can you?

What Blitz MEANS to say is…

You are the best warden here. With the most astute judgement, obviously. Warden Eiffel will find some way to screw up the request, if he grants it at all.

Which he should! But he isn’t as clever as you are. He needs some prodding.

Help him. Help him by helping his inmate.

I’ll tell him what I think, but it’s his decision.

I’m not right a lot of the time about a lot of things, but I’ll tell you what I’m not wrong about: people like you think people like me are weak, for being open about feelings, for choosing kindness. But Wardening my Inmate? I’m kind of good at it. Graduated one already and I’ll graduate this one, too. Cheap baiting won’t deter me from that path. Because if I don’t want other Wardens interfering with Kikimora, then I have to show them the same courtesy with their inmates.

[He just seethes because that isn't what he thinks at all but he's pretty sure nothing he says is going to matter to Malcolm anyway. So he shuts off his video and resigns himself to no progress in this area anyway.]

[A short time later.]

He’s agreed, so I expect you’ll see it soon. Take care of it and have fun.

Excellent. Thank you, Warden Bright.

Blitzo, to business?

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