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Date: 13 Aug 2021 12:57 (UTC)no subject
Date: 13 Aug 2021 16:27 (UTC)"I lived alone too," he says. "I emancipated but I was on my own for a while before then, anyway. Being here just reminds me of being back in boarding school, honestly. I guess that's one reason why I hate feeling trapped here." But back to the... relating. "Man, everyone's got problems. No 9 AM quiz of world history? Already an improvement to Brentwood."
no subject
Date: 13 Aug 2021 20:13 (UTC)“I went to boarding school, too,” he says.
no subject
Date: 13 Aug 2021 20:40 (UTC)track. This is like looking in a mirror, and just tells Tim that he should never really think about... a future. Tim manages to look sympathetic without knowing if he's, like, supposed to or not. "Yeah? It's like I was off to a new one every other semester. That last one- Brentwood. The dean had a dog so I'd give it, like, half my dinner every night so I could slip curfew."
Nothing was ever Elan levels or even remotely close to. It was just-- boarding school. Eagerly waiting for phone calls from home, or postcards for the holidays saying that his parents were home, reminding him that he's not. It's a lot of... gray. Feelings. A lot of his life is like that, though.
"I thought you were a cop, though?"
Double crap, he was not supposed to say that. Also: holy prejudice, Batman. Tim is glad he wasn't drinking. The kid backpedals. Hard. Eyes wide like he's surprised himself with that. "Uh-- I didn't mean that."
no subject
Date: 13 Aug 2021 21:01 (UTC)no subject
Date: 13 Aug 2021 21:21 (UTC)Save for the afflicting spontaneous combustion.
Maybe.
"That's cool."
Maybe.
"I dropped out."
Which he offered, why?
"At least ADI doesn't require much for now."
no subject
Date: 13 Aug 2021 22:21 (UTC)They weren’t going to get far if they danced around the elephants.
cw school shootings, death
Date: 13 Aug 2021 23:17 (UTC)But Bruce hadn't asked him, either. Bruce had come home. And he had never asked.
Tim's eyes storm over for a moment, and he's aware. He studies Malcolm and then just. Shrugs. "Things got hectic," he explains. He used that one with Ives. ...it hadn't worked out. Tim keeps quiet then continues, steady. He won't say anything that an internet search wouldn't have uncovered, back home. It still-- stings. It was still real. "Things were getting out of control in the city. We were looking like Baghdad."
Funny enough? He would know.
Tim taps his foot against the floor. It's just. some. residual frustrations. Makes it look authentic. (Jesus Christ, Drake. Not the time.)
"The gangs started shooting. I was actually back in public school. We were in the midst of it. Some of my friends... didn't make it." And that's it. Tim shrugs again.
Thinks, okay, so he's more tired than he thought.
"I didn't see the point after that. It wasn't an immediate drop or anything. And things got better but I just couldn't bring myself to care."
...
"My best friend and my girlf-- ex, they got ticked but I don't blame them. It's not like I told anyone I was gonna ditch. And it's not like it's mattered much either."
no subject
Date: 14 Aug 2021 00:30 (UTC)"Did you ever get treatment for the PTSD?" he asks.
no subject
Date: 14 Aug 2021 00:52 (UTC)Rightly so, Tim reminds himself. And to be even more generous to Malcolm, that was the picture Tim had shoved forward. It was one that made sense.
Like, hell, now that he's-- removed from it? Yeah. There's a reason Dick had been so concerned when
then why is he fighting to keep from bristling. "Like I said," Tim repeats, "things got better."
Debatable. But he nods, doesn't shy from Malcolm's gaze. "I got better, too."
no subject
Date: 14 Aug 2021 00:58 (UTC)"You must have, to accomplish the things you've accomplished."
Though Malcolm hasn't exactly gotten 'better' by any reasonable standard and he gets the job done.
"As long as the symptoms are manageable now, you don't really have to seek more help than you need."
no subject
Date: 14 Aug 2021 02:11 (UTC)(He knows the man's just throwing him a bone and it should incense him but what-- what is he supposed to do with this? The dude's just believed him like Tim's supposed to be trustworthy or something.)
Tim stares at his cup mournfully. Taps his foot against the floor. He shouldn't have talked about the schools. It's all blurred and murky, history butting heads with what should have been.
"Does lemon ginger chamomile tea usually help you sleep?" he asks.0
no subject
Date: 14 Aug 2021 02:31 (UTC)“Nothing helps me sleep, but lemon ginger chamomile tea helps me feel… slightly less like there’s a nest of wasps inside my head.”
no subject
Date: 14 Aug 2021 04:35 (UTC)no subject
Date: 14 Aug 2021 11:01 (UTC)A beat.
“Is your insomnia due to nightmares?”
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Date: 14 Aug 2021 15:08 (UTC)Now he can't remember the last time he dreamed. His mind's not built for that anymore. And he gets it, alright? He gets he has to take it as well as he's dished it out, and it stops Tim from bolting. "I don't know what it is, just that it's nothing new. And nothing to worry about."
no subject
Date: 14 Aug 2021 15:19 (UTC)no subject
Date: 14 Aug 2021 17:00 (UTC)"I'm fine."
Rote. Practiced. Tim would argue, it's true too. But he presses his tongue to the backs of his teeth and lowers his shoulders that one fraction they had hitched up. There is no they in question, here. And damn it he wants to clarify that.
"Seriously," he presses. Stands his ground, figuratively, and sighs back until the back of the chair presses against him. "Being told it's you versus the end of the world will screw anyone up. It's nothing important."
no subject
Date: 14 Aug 2021 17:25 (UTC)“The end of the world?”
no subject
Date: 14 Aug 2021 17:31 (UTC)Tim glares at his mug.
Moody, much?
He raises his brows, borderline-- really freaking exasperated, honestly. His alibi is at the ready at least. "Is that not what an 'Apocalypse' is?"
no subject
Date: 16 Aug 2021 15:07 (UTC)no subject
Date: 16 Aug 2021 15:22 (UTC)Tim frowns.
"I do," he admits like he's fighting against keeping his mouth clamped shut. If just because Not-A-Cop will see past his bullshit anyway. "There's always work to do. It's not a big mystery. Or problem. I appreciate the concern, though."
Spoilers, he does not.
no subject
Date: 16 Aug 2021 16:11 (UTC)no subject
Date: 16 Aug 2021 17:01 (UTC)He's made mistakes here. Noted. The worst part being that he always knew how to avoid them but, well, it's... nice. That Malcolm's concerned.
Tim's hand grips the handle of his mug, "I think the tea did help."
It's time for a retreat.
Tim makes to stand. "Thanks," he tries again. Awkwardly, boyishly. Genuinely. Go out on a high note and hide your head in the sand elsewhere. "I'll be in my room."
no subject
Date: 16 Aug 2021 17:04 (UTC)“I’m usually here at this time of night,” he points out. “If you ever want to talk some more.”