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[abrightboy]

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[ukan]

"That's how I did it, before we had wardens assigned to the positions." It's less stressful that way anyway, in his experience.

[abrightboy]

"It feels like I failed somehow. When Kiryu asked me to work there, I really thought it was a place where I could do good. It was so exciting. And it just... mostly didn't work out because I'm not really cut out for... talking to people. I guess. I still want to do it, but it just feels... diminished now. Because I wanted counselling to be a thing that could help anyone who needs it and everyone who wants it and I can't offer that to them because I'm not... fit for it," Malcolm explains.

[ukan]

"Malcolm, you will never find a group of people more resistant to therapy than the Barge citizens. You're in a job where you're fighting a half dozen currents at any given time. It's a thankless job. It doesn't mean you don't help; it just means you may not reach people as readily as you will off this ship." Lark has faith in him, enough faith to bring him to Los Angeles--something he rarely does. "Reaching one person here is like reaching five people at home, in terms of difficulty."

[abrightboy]

"But the people I had problems with were people who came to me to get counseling," Malcolm says.

[ukan]

He shrugs. "That honestly doesn't mean they're ready to hear what a therapist has to say. What were your problems with them, though?"

[abrightboy]

“Being understood. Like. Semantically. I say things and people consistently take it in a way other than how I mean it. I don’t know what to do about that,” Malcolm admits. “But it’s clearly me that’s the problem.”

[ukan]

"I have that problem, too." Lark can usually make himself understood if someone sticks through the conversation but he's stepped on plenty of toes, sometimes without meaning to. Sometimes he does.

[abrightboy]

"But people still like you," Malcolm points out.

[ukan]

A faint chuckle. "Opinions on me are mixed at best, Malcolm. A lot of people here hate me."

[abrightboy]

“What? Who?” Neal, probably, but Malcolm doesn’t know that. He hasn’t heard a word against Lark save for a couple friends concerned about him.

[ukan]

"Zack, Jedao, Eiffel, Neal, Iris sometimes. Sweeney." To name but a few.

[abrightboy]

“…How can Iris and Sweeney not like you? They’re in the pack,” Malcolm asks.

[ukan]

"Sweeney's not," he shakes his head slightly. "He's just an ally. And Iris doesn't like how I do things sometimes. Like the fact I have rules."

[abrightboy]

“I guess… since she said Sweeney is in the pack. Plus he came to the turnings. They were, like, big party do’s,” Malcolm muses.

[ukan]

Something dark crosses his expression. "Really." A faint twitch of his lip. "Then you're the only one who had the real ritual. It's a private matter."

[abrightboy]

“I preferred it with just me and Will. I don’t really like getting undressed in front of everyone. Or eating red meat,” Malcolm says making a bit of a face.

He’d gone along with it, though. He really wants to feel like Pack.

[ukan]

"I normally wouldn't have even allowed Will to be there, but I knew he'd want to take the change, too." You adapt or you die. That's the way of things. "Iris didn't know better. I didn't turn her the way I turned you, it was an experiment with her, test tubes.... But no, Sweeney isn't Pack, and I wouldn't have let him be there. It would have been a smaller affair."

[abrightboy]

“I think he enjoyed the… spectacle of it, though. Iris has a really cool hat that she saves for it,” Malcolm tells him.

[ukan]

Does he like hearing about his culture being made into an entertaining spectacle?

No. Not even a little.

But it's done.

"Good for him," Lark drawls. "I'm sure he'd love if we all gathered to gawk at his rituals, too."

[abrightboy]

Malcolm’s face falls. He said what he was saying wrong again.

“No,” he says, though there’s uncertainty in the way he fidgets again. He clears his throat. “No. I didn’t mean Sweeney. I was just trying to say that I don’t think Will feels cheated by getting Iris’ made up version of the ritual. Which was. Very ritual-y.” He shifts his weight uncomfortably.

[ukan]

"It's hard for me to see the pack change," Lark admits softly. "To have what I have at home and then see it here where it's...so different."

Adapt or die.

"Will's happy? Really happy?"

[abrightboy]

“Yeah. He loves being a wolf. He’s better at it than I am. But he’s always spent a lot of time with dogs.” He pauses. “If Iris is supposed to be in charge when you’re gone, why didn’t you train her?” It’s curious, not accusatory.

[ukan]

"Is Will thinking about life after the Barge yet?" Lark asks, and might have left the question unanswered. In Los Angeles he would have. He ignores the questions he doesn't feel like answering there. He does that on the Barge sometimes, too.

But Malcolm's pack, his last chosen pup, so he deserves an answer. "I don't always know what traditions she'll respect. They don't mean as much to her--she's very nontraditional. I don't want to pass along something that matters to me to someone who can't appreciate it."

[abrightboy]

“Will and I talk about our future a lot,” Malcolm admits, but he doesn’t elaborate.

[ukan]

He eyes him curiously. "And you still see yourself solving murders?"