Voicemail (IC Contact Post) NEW

[abrightboy]

This is Bright. Leave a message.

Comments

[abrightboy]

“It’ll probably come with others. Can you imagine how you would feel if something threatened him?” Malcolm asks.

[chaos_drifter]

“I would want to help, if I could.” They had felt that desire when the Barge crashed, and had acted on it. “I have no idea what I would feel. My body’s reactions are sporadic.” A bracelet manifests near their mouth, a leather band with a black oval-shaped stone.

[abrightboy]

"What if you weren't able to help and he was harmed?" Malcolm asks.

[chaos_drifter]

They hesitate, turning the bracelet over in their hands. It looks familiar, but they have no idea where they might have seen it. The cat in their lap rolls over and reaches for it, hooking her claws around the band. She pulls the bracelet towards her.

Not lost. Not guilty. Not sad. Not empty, or at least no emptier than usual. Nothing like the desperation they had sensed from Adam when they tried to kill his friend. They might be capable of feeling that, but the idea of Rawne being hurt does not make them feel anything that seems like it should penetrate them as Adam’s desperation had.

“I would feel disconnected.”

[abrightboy]

“Is that positive or negative?” Malcolm probes.

[chaos_drifter]

“More negative than positive, and more neutral than negative.” They pull a pen out of their pocket and one of the blank journals out of the bucket at their feet. They toss the bracelet towards the other end of the couch, and the cat follows it.

They sketch a set of x- and y-axes inside the front cover of the journal, labeling the ends of the x-axis “positive” and “negative”, and the ends of the y-axis “high energy” and “low energy.” Then they draw a circle near the center of the bottom left quadrant, close to the y-axis.

They turn the page towards Malcolm. “Like this.”

[abrightboy]

"How far along the y axis have you felt anything?" Malcolm asks.

[chaos_drifter]

“Not very far.” They mark a point just above the origin.

[abrightboy]

“So… by your baseline, your feelings about Rawne are pretty intense,” Malcolm surmises.

[chaos_drifter]

Avalon nods. “They are. The mental and physical components are still separate, but both are stronger than what I usually feel.”

[abrightboy]

"Is there anyone else here you feel that way about?" Malcolm asks.

[chaos_drifter]

“I may feel some empathy for Sameen Shaw, because both of us have difficulty recognizing our emotions. What I feel around her is more of an understanding than a connection, possibly because I spend less time with her.”

[abrightboy]

"Maybe it would benefit both of you if you tried spending more time with her," Malcolm suggests.

[chaos_drifter]

“It might. She seems to be comfortable talking to me.”

[abrightboy]

"I expect it's easier than talking to someone whose emotions she can't relate to."

[chaos_drifter]

“She is also not the kind of person I would have killed.”

[abrightboy]

Interesting. "Why is that?"

CW: Suicide

[chaos_drifter]

“Most of my victims already wanted to die.”

Re: CW: Suicide

[abrightboy]

Malcolm tilts his head.

"Will didn't."

[chaos_drifter]

“I know. I thought I could get him there, but he killed me instead.”

[abrightboy]

"We're survivors, me and Will," Malcolm tells him.

[chaos_drifter]

“Is that why you love each other?” Or like. They have trouble telling the difference.

[abrightboy]

Malcolm smiles faintly.

"No. But it's one of the reasons we understand each other."

[chaos_drifter]

Avalon takes the bracelet from the cat and wraps it around the wrist opposite their beads. Pensive flashes across the bracelet’s panel, then fades.

Oh. Now they recognize it. “I see.”

[abrightboy]

"Forming a connection with someone always requires some level of understanding and trust. And the deeper the understanding, the more likely a stronger bond of friendship or love. If you and Shaw have a fundamental understanding of each other because of your shared struggle with emotions, maybe you could become close friends," Malcolm suggests. "Though sharing an experience isn't necessarily required for understanding."