No One's Born Broken

[abrightboy]

For tinstar.



Gil came and went. Dani came and went. Ainsley came and then left with their mother, who refused to even hear him out about telling the truth. He stared through the window at the motionless man in the bed for some indeterminate amount of time, his hand clutching his phone in his pocket.

Finally he let his eyes leave the figure through the window and he took his phone out of his pocket. He stared at that for a long moment, then scrolled through his contacts until one name rolled onto the screen: Raylan Givens.

He looked through the window, then looked at the name. Then he pressed it.

Comments

[tinstar]

Raylan hummed a note as Malcolm lifted his head, watching the subtle lifts and valleys of his very expressive face. He could see the happy on Malcolm's face and was glad for it, but he still felt like it could have been happier. Ideal. He wanted to achieve the ideal with Malcolm, as often as he could.

"I hope so." He hoped that didn't change with the rising mount of bullshit they were hurdling towards. "I want you to have a place where you can have that without family bullshit. Next time you're down, it'll be better." He'd figure out how to handle all this, to mitigate contact until everyone was calm and friendly again. It was as good as a promise.

"And we've still got tonight and tomorrow, right?" he asked, lips curling as he bent in to kiss him. He wasn't going to let Winona ruin this. He couldn't.

[abrightboy]

Family bullshit meant there was family. It could be worse. At least Winona didn't walk in without knocking.

He leaned eagerly into the kiss, one hand sliding to grasp the back of Raylan's neck, the other landing on his shoulder.

"At least," he answered, a little breathless as the kiss broke. He glanced around and looked up at Raylan. "Do you really like it? I didn't want it to look like it's my place that you have keys to, like New York. I wanted you to feel at home here. Because it's yours. Is there anything you want that I missed?" Because he'd get it.

[tinstar]

The fact that he could leave Malcolm a little breathless with just a kiss was inspiring to say the least, and left Raylan with a soft cant on his face as Malcolm looked back up at him.

"Ours. And no, you didn't miss anything. Just a lot of you in my space here, that's all I want. I really do like it," he promised. "Do you?"

Because that was just as important - they didn't want to create a place like Malcolm's New York apartment here. Raylan wanted the blend of them. It was good.

[abrightboy]

"I love it," he said. "I love having somewhere to be with you down here..." He pressed a kiss to his mouth. "I love you." He looked around again. "It feels like the start of a real life together."

[tinstar]

Raylan hummed softly, lips following the kiss for a half second as it broke and he smiled at Malcolm's last words. "It is. A good home base for us while we're in Kentucky."

He was still looking forwards to Miami, but this gave them some kind of comfortable respite in the in between times. It was something to keep them afloat and fractionally less desperate for each other. Taking the opportunity, Raylan kissed Malcolm again, a little less chaste than their last few kisses. "I love you too," he said earnestly, as the kiss broke.

No matter what Winona said, there was no way she was shaking Raylan's confidence in this. In the way they both felt about each other. This wasn't a phase or a crisis - Raylan wanted to be with Malcolm the same way he'd wanted to be with Winona in the past. Two old souls on a porch with each other, looking over a garden or something with kids running around.

Winona clearly hadn't really wanted that. He couldn't believe that Malcolm didn't.

[abrightboy]

Raylan was the first person who made Malcolm feel like that kind of scene could be possible for him. That he could grow old with someone and they'd stand beside each other for the rest of their lives. He wanted it more than he'd ever suspected he would.

I love you too. Malcolm could feel his pulse increase when Raylan looked at him like that. Every time Raylan looked at him like that since the first time.

He glanced at the brand new bed, then looked up at Raylan, his hands sliding down his chest to his waistband to pull his shirts out of his pants, pushing them both up at once to reach smooth skin in their wake.

"How are you feeling about trying that out?" he said once the shirts had come over Raylan's head, tilting his own head towards the bed as he tossed the shirts aside. "Our bed," he clarified with a wide smile. "If we really like it, maybe we'll bring it to Florida."

I need a shirtless raylan icon, clearly

[tinstar]

There was no missing the shift of Malcolm's eyes or the change in tilt of electricity between them and Raylan shifted as needed to get the shirts off with a crooked grin at the question and 'Our bed', his own hands pushing Malcolm's t-shirt off as he answered.

"Very positive towards the idea," he replied as he hooked his fingers into Malcolm's waist band, pulling him forward once the elastic was stretched to its limit, not that he thought Malcolm would hesitate long enough to make that happen. "We'll bring it to Florida and if we don't like it, we'll look into a custom bed that we like better," Raylan continued as Malcolm slipped back into his arms, allowing his hands to push Malcolm's sweatpants off his hips.

"But let's not judge it before it can prove it's worth." Raylan couldn't stop himself from kissing Malcolm again, hands hungry to just get on the naked swath of the smaller man, over his sides and hips.

it would be a public service

[abrightboy]

Malcolm was eager to be under those hands, kicking the sweatpants aside as they traveled over him. He slid his own hands around Raylan's ribs and down his stomach, tugging his belt open by feel as he met the kiss hungrily, his fingers playing lightly against the skin beneath the waistband as he worked the button on the jeans.

"God," he gasped between kisses. "I feel like I haven't kissed you properly in a week." Though the previous night had been full of proper kisses, it seemed far away. Once he could push Raylan's jeans and boxers down over his hips, his slid his hands back up his sides and around and up his chest. He grasped his neck and jaw just below his ear with one hand and his shoulder with the other, closing the small amount of room he'd needed to work his pants off by pressing against him as he kissed him again.

<.< >.> I cant disagree

[tinstar]

Raylan groaned shortly at the words before his lips were properly occupied again, tightly holding them together as he turned Malcolm's back towards the bed. Breaking the kiss with a hum, Raylan tilted his face down for a half second before meeting Malcolm's eyes.

"I've been thinkin' about something," he admitted as he pushed Malcolm back onto the bed only to follow with his own weight, body propped up on his elbow, hair falling into his face. "So I just need you to.. shut up and let me do it, okay?" he asked, hazel eyes darting between blue.

[abrightboy]

Malcolm's experience with Raylan in bed so far had been overwhelmingly positive. He'd shown nothing but care in handling him, no matter how ardent his need. There was no guardedness in Malcolm's expression and no hesitation putting himself in Raylan's hands.

"Okay," he agreed, meeting his gaze with trust and openness, even while he remained a little breathless.

[tinstar]

He found himself a little breathless too, for entirely different reasons and kissed Malcolm with a fierceness, body sliding up against his before he broke the kiss and sent his lips down Malcolm's jaw with no shame about the amount of teeth slipped into his kisses.

Jaw led to collarbone, led to chest as Raylan worked his way down Malcolm, kissing and running his palms down his sides in time until he was moving down his yoga tightened stomach. There was no doubting that Malcolm's sharp mind would pick up what was going on, but Raylan didn't let that stop his want or resolve as his lips moved across the cut of Malcolm's hips towards the soft hairs.

[abrightboy]

After 'don't bring my attention to what I'm doing' and then the direction things took, Malcolm had a feeling where it was going and that was one step farther than the last time Raylan took this journey.

If they'd have talked about it, Malcolm might have suggested that he stopped above the waistband last time because he was only comfortable with the conventionally male roles in the bedroom and that that was okay.

And it really was.

But watching him make his way down there was also alluring as hell and Malcolm's breath hitched slightly as Raylan's teeth grazed his pelvis. He hoped that didn't count as not shutting up; he was trying to be good but damn. Raylan had probably felt him twitch against him more than once already.

[tinstar]

It was good, sweet, that Malcolm was okay with it but Raylan burned under his own internal hypocrisy and the conflict it came into with his preferences in the bedroom. He liked doing this, making his partners feel good with all parts of him. The idea of his mouth haunting them while he had casual conversations with him got him going.

He wanted to be okay with this and every twitch of Malcolm's length against his ever more personal skin moved him more towards his resolve and the reward of taking yet another leap off a cliff with Malcolm. Looking up, Raylan ran his tongue up Malcolm's length, unwilling to shy away from it, before he too Malcolm's cock into his mouth, pushing it against the back of his throat and setting to a rhythm that he was used to - that he liked.

He'd see how well that was received.

[abrightboy]

Malcolm was transfixed by the sight of Raylan moving down his body, but when his tongue traveled Malcolm's length, he couldn't help a strangled little sound from the back of his throat, followed by a gasp at the hot moisture that took it in.

The rhythm Raylan set was perfect and Malcolm was careful not to thrust into it, reaching down to grasp a handful of Raylan's hair, giving it a gentle squeeze as he moaned through a wave of arousal that made him squirm a little.

[tinstar]

He was the only one that would ever get to see or feel Raylan on his knees, and any quibbles of worry were washed away by Malcolm's sounds and the gently fisted hand in his hair. It bothered him less now that he was doing it; the overly dramatic buildup in his head hadn't come true - no sky split, no Arlo coming out of the closet to beat him.

Just an amazingly good man who made Raylan feel impossibly happy.It let him relax a little more, movements becoming smoother as his head slowly bobbed, tongue twisting around Malcolm's tip as he withdrew and then sunk his head again.

[abrightboy]

Malcolm was innately aware that this whole situation was a privilege. For a brief moment, as Raylan descended his body, he'd been concerned he was doing it out of a sense of some sort of obligation, but it didn't feel like that and he relaxed into it, too, as much as someone coiled in a building, tightly wound pleasure could relax.

The only other time someone had done this to him, it felt... quick and dirty. This was a very different experience, like going to bed with Raylan generally was. Sex was a different ritual with someone who loved you than when it was just fulfilling a physical need.

His sounds got needier. More urgent. He was drawing near climax. He wasn't completely sure how that was going to go over, but hoped it didn't put him off in a passing thought that quickly left his mind as he gasped Raylan's name.

[tinstar]

Despite the fact that this was the natural end to a blowjob, Raylan also hadn't really thought about was coming (badumtish) and there wasn't much space to do so here. Malcolm's noises and grips were just as effective from above and Raylan couldn't help but want to take him to his full end. Impulse was a terrible, wonderful thing.

He pulled up at the first spurt, hand taking over to help continue Malcolm over his crest, as his other came up to pause and wipe his lips with the back of his hand.

The first coherent thought that flashed through his mind was 'Shit, did I get it in my beard?'

[abrightboy]

Malcolm's abdomen tensed and his grip in Raylan's hair tightened a little as the wave of pleasure shot through him, but he was far too distracted to notice whether Raylan got anything on his face, at least at first. He blinked at the ceiling, breathing heavily for a moment as he flopped back onto his back before sitting up enough to prop himself on his elbows and look for Raylan. He shifted his weight to one elbow when he spotted him, reaching the other hand out for him to come up onto the bed properly so Malcolm could get his hands on him.

[tinstar]

Having the good mind to get up and snag his undershirt with a quick wipe of his hand, stopping to down the last of his scotch in one go before stalking back to the bed and his reaching lover. Raylan met Malcom with a hungry kiss as his off hand wiped up what mess he didn't swallow, chucking it off into the distance so he could run his hand up Malcolm's side.

[abrightboy]

Raylan tasted like salt and scotch and it was divine, or maybe that was just the fact that he clearly still wanted Malcolm after that. Malcolm had harboured the faintest concern that the experience might put Raylan off of him, but his attention had distracted it and the current heated kiss dismissed it entirely.

Malcolm's hand slid up his neck as he met the kiss with equal passion, the fingertips of his other hand coming to rest at Raylan's ribs at first, then his hand flattened out to splay there, then his grip tightened.

He grinned, breathless, as the kiss broke. "Is the moratorium on talking over? Because I need to tell you there's lube in the drawer," he explained, tilting his head towards it, "just like I promised."

[tinstar]

The bed hadn't been broken in yet; he still had work to do. He was still ready and needy himself, half on auto-pilot and having half forgotten that he'd issued some rules for the moment. It was hard to be anything else with Malcolm's hands and fingers propping and pressing against him. There would never be any not wanting Malcolm, not after all this.

Whatever Raylan had to wrestle with himself, he'd do in daylight like always, after the fact.

"Huh?" he asked with a little pinch of his brow before realizing what Malcolm meant and breaking with smile. "Oh, yeah, I suppose it is."

Pulling back and turning on his hip to sit, he tugged the drawer open and got out the new bottle that Malcolm had put in there with a grin as he looked over. "What if I said I wanted you to try out your restraints for something other than night terrors?"

[abrightboy]

He grinned. "I think you'd find me hard pressed to come up with any reason to object," he said. A beat. "Or to come up with any thoughts at all while you're looking at me like that," he added, scooting up the bed a little to reach them.

He picked up one of the cuffs and held it up. "Do you want to strap me in or....?"

[tinstar]

"I would love to strap you in," Raylan answered, face not letting up from whatever it was doing. He didn't know what it was doing but he liked the effect.

"You're on the wrong side though," he said, turning a finger round and round. "Roll over."

He shifted too, one knee on the bed as he strapped one wrist in before he crawled over to Malcolm's left side to do the same there.

"Up on your knees," he continued, voice taking on a slight edge of a commanding tone, but with a familiar husk to his voice. "I want that ass in the air."

[abrightboy]

God, that was hot. Was he supposed to pretend it wasn't thrilling? He was going to be bad at that, but he was face down, so Raylan couldn't see how pleased he was...

He got his knees under him, as directed, pulling the restraints taut for leverage. He could feel his heart beating in a combination of anticipation and excitement.

[tinstar]

No pretending needed; it was hot to watch Malcolm do as he was told and Raylan hummed almost theatrically as he ran a hand over and across Malcolm's ass as he shifted up into position. "You look good like this."

The lube bottle popped open with its own sense of drama in the otherwise quiet room and was swiftly followed by Raylan slapping Malcolm's left cheek. It was a test - how it felt doing it, how Malcolm felt about it, whether or not this was just some twisted fantasy of his that should stay as such.